A Long Time Ago.....

"What do you think that is?" he said, pointing down at the ground that seemed so very far away. She pulled her legs back tightly against the edge of the floor so that she could see beyond her perfect toes. Then, with a shrug of her shoulders she relaxed her calves and let them swing back and forth over the edge.

"How should I know, do you think I'm God?" They laughed at that. "Look," she said, pointing to their left. A soft white puff wafted towards them through the star studded sky. "Come on," she said with a little giggle. They grabbed hands and lept onto the gentle white air. Wading through the mists and changing depths of the cloud they reached the edge. They laid down on their stomachs and leaned over to watch the day's creation below.

"Look at that!" He said with awe in his voice as dirt was scooped up from the fresh ground and spit on. The wet mud rolled around in the Maker's hand, gently pressed and formed. "Whoa, that's insane." She laughed slightly at his amazement, but inside, she felt the same.

Slowly the clay took form. First a long rod. Then it had branches come out of it in five places. One branch was molded and bent to have movable joints, and then flattened at the end for a base. The one next to it went the same way. At almost the top of the shape, the next two branches got their own joints, but these were different. Five tiny twigs appeared in perfect shape,at the very ends, all of varying lengths.

The next branch was beyond far the greatest to watch. Her eyes danced in wonder as she watched. He gasped in awe. Carefully the branch was smoothed into a round sort of ball shape. Two small ovals in the middle with coverings. A pointed section that came off the ball between the two ovals. A curved opening just under the point, slightly redder than the rest of the ball. "What do you think those are?" She asked, pointing to something on the sides of the ball. One on each side, shaped almost like the wing of a butterfly. But it wasn't a wing.

"I think," he paused to think, "don't the really big fat gray things have those too? I think He called them," he scratched his head, "I think He called them ears. Yeah, ears, that's it. Those are ears."

"Ears? Gabriel, be serious."

"Sh! Watch!" They leaned forward in rapt attention. The 'ears' were covered now by a light layer of fur on top of the ball. The form was lifted up by a gentle hand. Up into the tree tops, where the arms had been reaching down from. A face appeared and leaned over the body. There was a wind, mighty and rushing so that it even blew their seat back from the ground, further than it already was.

"Whoa."

"Did He just---"

"Yeah, He just breathed into it. His own breath."

"Whoa."

Today is the Virgin's day

in Costa Rica. They don't have school or work or anything. This is the day when people from all over the country walk to Cartago to the Basilica. The Basilica is the biggest church in Costa Rica, really big. I've been there. And then outside, is this fountain sort of thing, that has 'holy water.' I saw a man fill a big jug with that water.

It's so sad. Mark Edwards walked with people there one time. He went up to all sorts of the ticos and tried to tell them about God's love. About how this walk means nothing, all they need is Jesus. Ernesto told me that Mark almost started crying, he was in so much pain for the ticos.

The world is so lost. I feel so incredibly helpless to do anything. Like I can't help anyone. I feel so stuck in this little cocoon that I am in. No one listens to me very seriously. No one really respects my ideas because I am too old fashioned. And of course, I know nothing of boys considering my singleness.

I don't know. I want something to do. I want to help the world, but I feel so trapped. I feel like no one wants my help. I can listen to poeple all day long, and I know that is what they want, but it doesn't seem like enough.

I feel useless.

Interesting

Jesus did not die at the hands of muggers, rapists, or thugs. He fell into the well-scrubbed hands of deeply religious people, society's most respected members.

-Brennan Manning

home sweet home

I have nothing to say. Yea.

I really miss Costa Rica. Which is strange, isn't it? I am really liking Colorado right now. And yet I am still missing Costa Rica.

We went to South Dakota for vacation. There was nothing there. We went through a town called Lost Springs. It had a population of 1. 1!!! I mean seriously, I thought that couldn't count for an actual town...

Anyway, I got to drive home for the last two or three hours of the way. From Cheyenne apx. We were just coming onto the edge of Fort Collins, and it was late, and I could see all these beautiful yellow and white lights shinning in the darkness. And they were blinking on and off as civilization progressed with its night. And I can not begin to describe to you.

It was beautiful.

I started laughing, almost hysterically. "Look! Lights! Civilization!" My dad looks up from, whatever he was looking down at.

"Oh, yea, Fort Collins."

So I know it wasn't Denver or anything, but I just don't know how to explain this. It was like coming home. I've hardly ever thought of Colorado as home. But getting back from Lost Springs South Dakota, it was amazing. All those lights gleaming, reaching out into the night welcoming me back home. Home.

I like living in Colorado. Woo. I have never liked it before. I have lived here 4 years, and hated it all that time. I mean, I've been content and complacent about it. It isn't as though I pray every night to move or something. But for the first time, I thanked God for Colorado. I thanked him, becasue I was so excited to come home. For the first time I actually looked at those mountains, and thought to myself.

Wow, there really is no place like home.

Last night at wendy's....

Ryan: they broke my jaw... couldn't eat solid food for 6 weeks, I lost 12 pounds, and I got lots of vikoden
Cierra: I love vikoden, I got it when they took out my wisdom teeth, it helped me sleep really well
Me: I was really weird on vikoden.. or was it perkoset? No I think it was vikoden
Austin: I take vikoden on weekends