Every house has it's black chimney.
A house of daughters is a cellar full of sour beer.
Twelve horses can not pull back what a tongue has let go.
The ocean can not be emptied with seven spoons.
What three people know, everyone knows.
29.12.06
27.12.06
ah the obligatory...
since I skipped the usual "merry Xmas" post. Here's a short update on my life before I go to bed.
this is me holding Faith, one of Kelli William's twins! I got to feed and burp her, she is so sweet. 5 pounds, 4 ounces. She was born December 26 at 3.30 am along with her sister Callie. I am so excited, it was my one Christmas wish, that I could hold these girls before going back to school, and it came true!
(halfway at least. Callie decided she wanted to come out left arm and left leg instead of head or rear. So in the process of repositioning her, the doctor bruised her ankle and broke her wrist. [which is now in the cutest little splint] So I can't hold Callie. But Faith was so beautiful! Please keep the Williams in your prayers as they bring the babies home this week!)
Merry Christmas all the year round.
sara
21.12.06
17.12.06
15.12.06
How do you learn things?
not things. That's a bad description. How do you learn to have a good attitude? Here, let me give you the situation.
There are six people in my USEM from Colorado. Just after Thanksgiving we thought it would be great fun to have everyone together for a Christmas party when we were all home. So we decided on the friday after classes ended--Friday the 15th. IE tonight. I offered to host, becuase I love having people over. I was going to get a pizza, we could watch movies, it was going to be great. Then, Hannah had the incredible idea of making it a Red Tie party! We were so excited, a chance to get dressed up, I decided on a formal dinner, movies, games, sweet! can life get better?
So I cook/clean for the entire day, plus the time it took to make the cheesecake last night. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to sound like I slaved over this, because it was actually so much fun for me. I love cooking, I like cleaning with the music turned up really loud on the stereo. So it was great.
But then someone couldn't come. She had work--I totally emphathize with that. We've all had times when we can't get the night off to actually do something good. But then someone else canceled. 20 minutes before the party was supposed to start.
So that is my question. I know that God blesses us, even when we feel forgotten or marginalized by people. I know that he will bless my time, my money, my efforts, my excitement to entertain and feed people. But I still feel so hurt. I feel angry. Is that wrong? I shouldn't feel angry. This perosn had out of town guests. They had to stay at home per parental request. It wasn't their fault. But still, it wasn't like I gave them late notice, it wasn't like they hadn't known about this. I am upset, and then I'm angry that I'm upset. Because God values what I did, and he will bless that, so why am I upset?
this is me processing in writing. because, that is waht I do. So really, you can ignore most of this. I just needed to get it out. Sometimes having it on paper/screen helps it to make more sense.... though, it isn't really working out so well tonight.
There are six people in my USEM from Colorado. Just after Thanksgiving we thought it would be great fun to have everyone together for a Christmas party when we were all home. So we decided on the friday after classes ended--Friday the 15th. IE tonight. I offered to host, becuase I love having people over. I was going to get a pizza, we could watch movies, it was going to be great. Then, Hannah had the incredible idea of making it a Red Tie party! We were so excited, a chance to get dressed up, I decided on a formal dinner, movies, games, sweet! can life get better?
So I cook/clean for the entire day, plus the time it took to make the cheesecake last night. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to sound like I slaved over this, because it was actually so much fun for me. I love cooking, I like cleaning with the music turned up really loud on the stereo. So it was great.
But then someone couldn't come. She had work--I totally emphathize with that. We've all had times when we can't get the night off to actually do something good. But then someone else canceled. 20 minutes before the party was supposed to start.
So that is my question. I know that God blesses us, even when we feel forgotten or marginalized by people. I know that he will bless my time, my money, my efforts, my excitement to entertain and feed people. But I still feel so hurt. I feel angry. Is that wrong? I shouldn't feel angry. This perosn had out of town guests. They had to stay at home per parental request. It wasn't their fault. But still, it wasn't like I gave them late notice, it wasn't like they hadn't known about this. I am upset, and then I'm angry that I'm upset. Because God values what I did, and he will bless that, so why am I upset?
this is me processing in writing. because, that is waht I do. So really, you can ignore most of this. I just needed to get it out. Sometimes having it on paper/screen helps it to make more sense.... though, it isn't really working out so well tonight.
8.12.06
There's this girl I know
she lives on my floor.
she plays guitar and has a really great singing voice. We're recording a song on Lindsey's computer because she has garage band. (woot for macs) I am doing harmony and my friend is doing every thing else. It's amazing.I am sitting on Banana's bunk right now, listening to Lish play guitar, she is trying so hard, trying to be perfect. Lindsey just told her she played passionately. It's true. I don't even have to watch her rock back and forth, I don't have to see the look on her face. I can hear it in the way she picks and strumms. I can hear it in the squeaks as her fingers slide along the strings.
I wish I lived with passion like that. I didn't study for my final today. because I just didn't care. I didn't say I love you to so many people today. I didn't stay in Gwinn to talk with everyone. Because I feel so apathetic. Maybe I am just drained, from the quarter, from guys, from friends, from everything that God has shown me. I am so tired, so exhausted.
But that doesn't mean I should live without passion. I mean, if anything, I have learned so much, and I am so happy and so at peace and so in awe of God that this should drive me to live even more passionately, even more on fire (cliche) for God. But at the same time, I just want to rest. I just want to go to my favorite spot back home in Colorado, sit at the dead end and just stare out into the open plains and emptiness that goes all the way out to motsenbocker road.
I want to write, and not on my book, but just whatever I am feeling at the moment. I want to be alone. oh sweet loneliness.
But Alicia is starting to play again, and I want to watch her. Watch her even as she screws up and gets angry with her imperfections. Watch her head nod, rock back and forth. Watch her be emotional over one song and be so passionate.
"the point is, you can play like that. dang."
she plays guitar and has a really great singing voice. We're recording a song on Lindsey's computer because she has garage band. (woot for macs) I am doing harmony and my friend is doing every thing else. It's amazing.I am sitting on Banana's bunk right now, listening to Lish play guitar, she is trying so hard, trying to be perfect. Lindsey just told her she played passionately. It's true. I don't even have to watch her rock back and forth, I don't have to see the look on her face. I can hear it in the way she picks and strumms. I can hear it in the squeaks as her fingers slide along the strings.
I wish I lived with passion like that. I didn't study for my final today. because I just didn't care. I didn't say I love you to so many people today. I didn't stay in Gwinn to talk with everyone. Because I feel so apathetic. Maybe I am just drained, from the quarter, from guys, from friends, from everything that God has shown me. I am so tired, so exhausted.
But that doesn't mean I should live without passion. I mean, if anything, I have learned so much, and I am so happy and so at peace and so in awe of God that this should drive me to live even more passionately, even more on fire (cliche) for God. But at the same time, I just want to rest. I just want to go to my favorite spot back home in Colorado, sit at the dead end and just stare out into the open plains and emptiness that goes all the way out to motsenbocker road.
I want to write, and not on my book, but just whatever I am feeling at the moment. I want to be alone. oh sweet loneliness.
But Alicia is starting to play again, and I want to watch her. Watch her even as she screws up and gets angry with her imperfections. Watch her head nod, rock back and forth. Watch her be emotional over one song and be so passionate.
"the point is, you can play like that. dang."
6.12.06
a lot of things
last night was one of my best since coming here. After my Public Speaking final, which was hilarious (I don't care who invented the Bible! [shatzie]), I went and hung out in Emerson. I need to hang out there more, because some of my favorite people live there. Noelle, Nick, Joel, Alyssa. I had such a blast, being crazy with Noelle (hey, remember that one time I punched you in the face?) and then having a good conversation with Alyssa about the guy I like, and relationships and all that jazz. It was so much fun.
And then Karin and Lindsey and I went out on a SLAK date. We went to Minnie's Caffe at 10:30, it was amazing. I got to break my fast with two of my favorite people, and with good eggs and crunchy bacon. And we all shared this insane peice of pie.
But the best thing about the SLAK date was our conversation. I shared with Linds and K this epiphany I had at church the other day. It wasn't anything we don't already know, but it was just something that hit me in greater depth and i have been living on it for a few days.
I am so happy here. We are going to give scarves that we knitted/crocheted to homeless people today. I am so excited. And tonight I am going back down to Emerson for a study group and then just for fun. Tomorrow I have one last final, I will pack, Karin and I will bunk beds and I will go home on friday. I go home on Friday! And I still have a lot of Christmas presents and love to hand out. I need to run.
And then Karin and Lindsey and I went out on a SLAK date. We went to Minnie's Caffe at 10:30, it was amazing. I got to break my fast with two of my favorite people, and with good eggs and crunchy bacon. And we all shared this insane peice of pie.
But the best thing about the SLAK date was our conversation. I shared with Linds and K this epiphany I had at church the other day. It wasn't anything we don't already know, but it was just something that hit me in greater depth and i have been living on it for a few days.
I am so happy here. We are going to give scarves that we knitted/crocheted to homeless people today. I am so excited. And tonight I am going back down to Emerson for a study group and then just for fun. Tomorrow I have one last final, I will pack, Karin and I will bunk beds and I will go home on friday. I go home on Friday! And I still have a lot of Christmas presents and love to hand out. I need to run.
5.12.06
Roger
why can't I comment on your blog? because I switched to beta? ARG. I am growing weary of blogger. anyway, when I am home I am going to ask for your help on my template. I really don't like this one any more. it's driving me crazy. (I will only ask for help if that is okay, because it is Christmas time, and you must be busy in finals, I know)
I LOVE EVERYONE!
I just wanted to say that and put it in caps. Becasue it's so true.
I LOVE EVERYONE!
I just wanted to say that and put it in caps. Becasue it's so true.
4.12.06
234 sweet post number
this is because I haven't updated in a while. so here are somethings that are going on.
Finals. My first one is in 40 minutes. woot.
Boys. they create a lot of stress. one of the best part of being married will be that I don't have to think about them.
God. Oh my gosh! Did you know that we get to worship the God of the universe? And he likes us? Is that not insane?
Music. I can sing, but not as well as some people. that has been a humbling experience.
being tired and struggling with emotional stuff is a bad combination.
when you put baby powder on your hair it absorbs the oil/greasyness and you don't have to shower.
heart you all mucho.
sara
Finals. My first one is in 40 minutes. woot.
Boys. they create a lot of stress. one of the best part of being married will be that I don't have to think about them.
God. Oh my gosh! Did you know that we get to worship the God of the universe? And he likes us? Is that not insane?
Music. I can sing, but not as well as some people. that has been a humbling experience.
being tired and struggling with emotional stuff is a bad combination.
when you put baby powder on your hair it absorbs the oil/greasyness and you don't have to shower.
heart you all mucho.
sara
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