except for that one time back in third grade. Oh and then the time last year- just kidding.
Seriously though. I have been crazy selfish the last few days. Have you heard that I called Wayne and gave him a list of the reasons why I should get to have a tica stay at my house? and no one else should? well, I did. Yep, I'm cool, I call and yell at the trip leader over the phone.
Actually I didn't yell, but you get the point. I was so consumed, why is God doing this to me? I mean, for crying out loud Minor is staying at Connor's house. Why did I get neglected so badly? I thought that it was so totally all about me. Which, I mean, it should be right? Ha! No. Because if it was, the world would be a mess.
Anyway, so I got to church this morning, all upset, with a bee in my bonnet, and I am so mad! Because I deserve a Tica! God hasn't a clue about this. I read in my quiet time this monring about suffering. Totally brushed it off thinking that was for people who are bed ridden or pregnant and can't get anough chinese food to satisfy the craving. (Becuase according to my mom, that is suffering)
And then we were singing some song, gosh I don't even know what it was. And it hit me. The devotional talked about how God allows us to go through suffering, to burn away the impurities of life, to get to our most basic emotions when it comes to God. He wants to teach us to sing for him in all situations, and to sing for joy even in the midst of the flames.
Me, I was trying to get out of the flames. I was trying to get a hold of some water. Get a hold of a tica. But no, God had some other plans. and all of a sudden, i was so happy. Because I totally remembered.
The ticos are coming.
And just their coming is a miracle. They are coming to serve God. To show others how he has changed their life. I should be singing, I should be jumping up and down for what God has done to provide these wonderful people with the ability to come up here. Who cares who they stay with? I might be suffering without seeing them as much, and because I can't go to Costa Rica this summer. In fact I am suffering because of the latter. But, they're coming. God is teaching me that I can not expect him to work the way I plan. And suffering is normal. I just need to be happy and sing about it. I need to be happy that God's plan is working out the exact way he planned. Even if it didn't include me.
They're coming.
And that's enough.
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4 comments:
Hey, honestly I was really upset that I wasn't getting a Tico. And honestly, I really wanted to call Wayne and complain too. I agreed with the reasons and everything. I saw why they weren't doing it, but I still wanted one. Like you said, I was being selfish. And then, I finally gave it up and said oh well. And I even told Wayne on the phone that I was glad he was doing it the way he was. This was like two weeks ago. And I was totally cool with it and accepted the fact that I wasn't oging to have one.
And then, Becky called my mom up on Friday and said something had fallen through and asked if we could host a tico, and my mom knew how much I had wanted to, so she jumped at it and said yes. Then she called me as I was getting on the bus to go to the track meet, but I missed her call, so I checked the message and I found out I was so happy...
But overall, my point was that I was in the exact same situation as you were in and I felt the exact same way. I felt a little cheated. But as God has showed me over and over again, when we give it up to Him and let Him change our heart, he rocks our world.
it was really cool, because i gave it over to God yesterday morning, and then I was talking to becky later. I asked if they had a place to keep the pastor, because originally they wanted us to do that. and then becky said that some people were going out of town for spring break early. like the lira's.
so i get to keep natalie for the last two nights. it was so weird though. like once i was willing to let God do it his way, he totally blessed me with that opportunity. I mean, even just two nights is awesome.
dude, i have no idea why i was chosen to have a tico, but i think God is going to do something sweet with it. it is cool how as soon as we give something over to God, He figures something out and then we feel really dumb for not trusting Him in the first place. been there many times.
thats awesome.
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